Little Bo Beep has lost more than her sheep. Where is the other half of her costume? Judging from what’s on the costume shelves this Halloween, a woman may be out of luck unless she is ready to push up, tape up or bare all.
I’m not the modest type, but I have to admit that I blushed even in the privacy of the dressing room at a local costume store as I attempted to squeeze into a white nurse’s outfit – one of this season’s best selling costumes.
Do people really wear this stuff? In public?
As I looked into the mirror, I reflected on more than my image. When did Halloween change from a fun time when all could pretend they are children once again to a thinly disguised sexual-themed event featuring bondage and sleaze?
So maybe not the nurse’s uniform.
My other options: How about the police woman costume complete with thigh-high boots and handcuffs? And since when do cops carry whips?
How about the lady vampire outfit? The tag says one size fits most. Most of what?
Or the sexy witch? They used a whole square foot of cloth on that one.
Is there any costume that does not require a bustier?
What happened to goblins, princesses, cowboys or Indians?
Oh, they come with a bustier, too?
I understand why the guys are all for the fishnets, high heels and exposed body parts because under normal circumstances, they could only be seen in a Vegas strip joint or a Victoria’s Secret catalog.
But what is in it for us females?
Under normal circumstances, the average woman would be horrified to walk around in public dressed as a French maid. So why is it what we consider attractive and sexy the other 364 days of the year goes flying out the window on All Hallow’s Eve?
Is it black magic or the full moon?
Our male counterparts don’t seem to be under some spell to strip down and flaunt what their mothers gave them. I doubt you’ll see Speedos or male thongs at many of the parties around town.
Halloween should be a day when we can embrace our inner creativity, not our inner skankiness. Does inch-thick eyeliner and the butterfly tattoo on your lower back really have that much impact when the girl standing right next to you looks the exact same. But wait. She wins. She has double D’s, and how can you compete with that cleavage?
Why do costume designers think – or maybe they don’t think – that instead of trick-or-treat, women want to look like they are turning tricks?
Maybe because they sell.
I say bring back originality to Halloween. And maybe a touch of modesty. Look the word up. I’ll wait.
Confused on how you can come up with an outfit that doesn’t involve chains, leather and stripper heels?
Why not dress as your own Facebook profile, a fruit roll-up or baby Suri Cruise?
As you prepare for next week’s festivities, may I suggest you focus more on dressing up and less on undressing?
Jamie Crum is a senior broadcast journalism major from Colorado Springs, Colo.