Welcome to the best four years of your life. Within the next few weeks, you will receive numerous free T-shirts, credit card offers and maybe even go to your first college party.
So here’s a little to-do list to follow before beginning the college grind.
In particular, there are some objects that are must-haves for the first time on campus.
Every incoming college student needs to indicate their level of cool from high school by showing off a senior yearbook. Some people call these memories frozen in time an “annual,” but the over-arching theme is the same – the more your picture is taken, the cooler you are. Everyone cares about your high-school extracurriculars and how many signatures you received. Winning a superlative is the zenith of your accomplishments, brag.
Speaking of having ways to show off the prep-school activities, a letterman’s jacket is the best way to let people know about a nickname and how many years you were the junior-varsity football receiver. If your jacket has an All-State patch on it, you will be revered by all the seniors who catch you sporting the jock look at a party. Girls love the letterman patches, no lie. West Brook 2004, for life.
Then again, the best way to prove the ability to have adult friendships and relationships is by toting a high-school sweetheart to college. Even if that means having the significant other at a nearby university.
Of course, college does have formal dances, but where is the fun in that? The best dance of your life came last spring when you went to your senior prom. It is unfortunate that the tuxedo was a rental, but you can still press the corsage and boutonniere inside a little scrapbook full of the best times you had in high school. Remember trying to buy the flowers to match her dress or his tie? Well, those days are gone, so holding on to some rotten, dehydrated rose petals may be the best option. I’m a senior. Trust me.
These nuggets of information may not be the best guide, but the best way you can grow is by doing and learning from mistakes during your years as a Horned Frog.
Marcus Murphree is a senior news-editorial journalism major from Beaumont.