Too often ladies tell me the dating scene here at TCU is dead or dying, that it is lost forever to modern society’s preoccupation with sex and alcohol and that nothing can bring it back.Well, guess what: It’s not dead.
Women here often theorize that men are at fault and that we have lost our capacity for romance and courtesy. Back in the “good ole’ days,” a man would bring a woman flowers, pick her up at her door, treat her to a nice dinner and drop her off – innocently – at her residence before curfew. That ideal scene has slowly devolved into the one we submit ourselves to now: a smoky bar, an empty mug and a not so innocent, “Wanna’ go somewhere?”
But here’s another surprise for you ladies out there: It might not be all our fault.
Yes, some men are sex-crazed pigs. Yes, some men have either lost – or never had – the ability to be a sweetheart. But not all men.
I am not claiming to be a saint. On the scale from jerk to nice guy, I am probably closer to the former. But it does not take a gentleman to know one. There are men on this campus who know how to treat women and would prove it given the chance. The main problem here, however, is getting that chance.
This is where the ladies come in. I am telling you straight up that women here need to raise their standards.
I know the gender breakdown at TCU. I have heard the argument that the female 60 percent of campus is forced to settle for the less than ideal male 40 percent. Since men here know they have the numerical advantage, they exploit it by acting less than chivalrous and still land a girl every night. Well ladies, if you hate being continually used by the low-grade part of the male population, start respecting yourselves and say no.
If you enjoy the “hook-up” scene, then I am happy for you, and I hope all is well. But if you do not, and you want better from your men, there are other options out there. Hint: They don’t always frequent crowded bars at questionable hours.
Despite popular opinion, males are actually intelligent beings. We recognize negative reactions and adapt our dating strategies to please the female in question. Therefore, if you refuse to accept the lowbrow techniques certain TCU males employ, we might just raise our standards, too. If men here start seeing desirable women turning their backs on promiscuous, bleary-eyed bar hoppers, you might be surprised just how quickly we get back in touch with our sweetheart roots. And on top of all of that, when you start rejecting the one-night stand or late-hour rendezvous, it might be surprising how many truly nice guys are waiting in the wings.
Escaping the vicious dating cycle we are trapped in has to fall on the shoulders of all the students here, not just the men. While guys will always be to blame for societal ills such as excessive burping and watching too much football, the romantic drought TCU faces is certainly a co-ed conundrum.
Travis Stewart is a junior broadcast journalism major from Sugarland.